Ugh, my sleep schedule has flipped upside down in such a short length of time. It’s now half past 8 in the evening on Friday and I’m uploading the latest chapter of my FNAFiction, Everything Is All Right, Part Three: Mike Schmidt and the Long Night now because I cannot stay awake any longer. I had to retreat to my bedroom to write this, where there is only one sleeping cat and not four sleeping kittens, all of them mocking me with their brazen appetites for sleep. So tired…
No change on the kitten front, by the way, but we very nearly acquired a dog the other day when we opened our front door and found an enormous dog shivering on our porch. Naturally, we immediately gave him something to eat and drink while we exhausted our limited investigatory skills. Super-friendly, calm, didn’t bark at our dad’s dog or chase our kittens. No collar, but a nice coat, no sores, clean ears and eyes, trimmed toenails. Emaciated, but it really doesn’t take long for a big healthy dog to go from slender and fit to skeletal, especially in winter. Our theory was that he’d run away (we hoped he’d run away anyway; the holidays are a popular time for people to abandon their pets) about a week ago, but we couldn’t find any lost dog notices around the community, in the papers or online that matched his description. My sister Cris had the wise idea to call City Hall for advice, because it’s a small town and what do we pay taxes for if not to advise constituents about lost and found dogs?
Yeah, I’m laughing, but they had a protocol in place and not only did the city official cheerfully call a local cop to swing by and take a found-dog report, but also arranged for the local vet to board him until his family was found or, if necessary, he found a new family. We should have asked what the protocol was for kittens…
Anyway, all’s quiet once again on the home-front, but seeing that poor, slate-thin dog in the snow has made all of us appreciate our cozy home and family even more. Which is only appropriate for the season. Considerably less appropriate is my Five Nights at Freddy’s fanfiction! (“Nice segue!” “Thanks!”) So head on over to fanfiction.net or archiveofourown.org and check it out! Still on the fence about whether or not to read this one? Well, if you’ve managed to resist 30+ chapters so far, one more isn’t going to make a difference, but what the hell, I’ll leave you with an excerpt anyway. Christmas is about giving.
Freddy still had not moved, not so much as the wiggle of an ear or a grunt to acknowledge all the squishing and muttered swearing that prefigured Bonnie’s approach, but as Bonnie rounded the carousel and limped up behind him, he suddenly spoke: “I’M. GOING. TO. K-K-KILL. HER.”
Bonnie halted mid-step.
Freddy glanced at him and shrugged, still glaring. “NOT. REALLY. BUT. I. CAN. NOT. BELIEVE. HOW. MAD. I. AM. WHERE IS SHE?”
“You d-don’t think she’s in t-tr-trouble, do you?”
Freddy growled through his speaker and turned his attention back to the window and through it, presumably to the road beyond the edge of the bluff. Bonnie couldn’t see it, between the growing darkness and the scum coating the glass, but he guessed he’d be able to make out headlights if there were any. And there weren’t. “YOU. DON’T. WANT. TO. KNOW. WHAT. I’M. THINKING. RIGHT. NOW.”
‘Leave it alone,’ Bonnie told himself as he followed Freddy’s footsteps out. ‘Don’t push. If you corner him, you know what he’ll do, so just…just let it be.’ And then he said, “But you’re not-t-t mad at her, right?”
“NO.” Freddy sighed. “AND. YES. WHERE IS SHE? THIS. IS. NOT. HER. HOUSE. IT’S. MINE. SHE. DOESN’T. GET. TO. COME. AND. GO. WHEN. EVER. SHE. FEELS. LIKE. IT.”
“You said-d-d she could.”
“WELL. I. DIDN’T. MEAN. IT.”
A shiver rattled through Bonnie’s body. His pinkie fell off. He picked it up and fidgeted it back into place, but it wasn’t going to stay long. It needed a screw. He shivered again.
Freddy did not appear to be watching him, and the window-glass was too filthy to offer up a reflection, but at the second shiver, he sighed. “I’M. NOT. MAD. AT. HER. NOT. REALLY. IT’S. JUST.” He stopped there, not clicking, just quiet.
“SHE. SHOULD. BE. HERE,” said Freddy. His arms lifted and dropped. “AND. I. HATE. THAT. I’VE. STARTED. THINKING. THAT. OF COURSE. SHE. SHOULDN’T BE HERE. NO. ONE. SHOULD. BE. HERE. BUT. I. DON’T. LIKE. THAT. SHE’S. NOT. HERE. NOW.” Freddy’s gaze swept the road one last time before he turned around. Grumbling low in his throat, he started walking, leaving deep depressions in the undergrowth to slowly fill in with ooze. “I. NEVER. SEE. HER. EAT. SHE. ALMOST. NEVER. SLEEPS. SHE. WORKS. TWELVE. HOURS. AND. THEN. COMES. HERE. AND. WORKS. EVEN. MORE. I’D. ALMOST. BE. HAPPIER. IF. I. K-K-KILLED. HER. MYSELF. THAN. WATCH. HER. DO. IT. LIKE. THIS.”
Bonnie opened his mouth to tell him not to say things he didn’t mean, then closed it again without talking at all, just in case Freddy did actually mean it.
“I’M. NOT. MAD,” Freddy said again, passing him. “EXCEPT. I. AM. THE. SAME. WAY. I. DON’T. WANT. HER. HERE. EXCEPT. I. DO. AND. I. REALLY. REALLY. DON’T. LIKE. NOT. KNOWING. WHEN. SHE’S. GOING. TO. WALK. IN.”
“She’s not doing-ing it to piss you off. She’s got-t-t stuff to do.”
“SO. DO. I.” Freddy surely knew what that sounded like, because he grumbled to himself as he pulled the door open, but he couldn’t leave it alone any more than Bonnie could, it seemed. “IF. SHE’S. GOING. TO. BE. HERE. SHE. SHOULD. BE. HERE. AT. A. REASON. ABLE. HOUR,” he stated. “THAT’S. ALL. THERE. IS. TO. IT.”
“Oh c-c-come on.”
“NO. IT’S. DISRESPECTFUL. TO. SAY. SHE’LL. BE. HERE. AND. THEN. STAY. OUT. ALL. NIGHT.” Freddy grunted, his eyes moving restlessly from toy to toy within the gym, still monitoring the playground years after the kids had all gone home. “LET. ALONE. WHAT. SHE’S. OUT. THERE. DOING.”
“You can’t-t-t give her a c-c-curfew, Freddy.”
“THE. HELLO! I. CAN’T.”
“She’s not a k-k-k—KIDS UNDER FOUR EAT FREE—kid,” Bonnie argued.
“I. DON’T. CARE. HOW. OLD. SHE. IS,” Freddy started to say. He stopped, cupped his muzzle and shook his head into his palm, then dropped his arm and boomed, “AS. LONG. AS. SHE. LIVES. IN. MY. HOUSE. SHE. OBEYS. MY. RULES. GOOD. GOD. BONNIE. WHAT. AM. I. TURNING. INTO.”
“Kind of a jerk-k-k, to be honest.”